Dumbest Fortnite Battle Royale Player
Fortnite is not just cartoon PUBG, there are huge differences. For example, you can build stuff. And, while Fortnite was developed by a company that also makes a game engine, PUBG makes your computer sound like an engine. As I was downloading it, which took about 3 minutes, (tough luck Australia) I decided this was the game I was gonna give my life to. To become an expert… Then I came in second place in my first match by hiding in bushes. Really need to be able to cut these down. I should be celebrating my placement, but I feel hollow. I’m just too naturally talented at this. I feel bad for taking the award away from someone who deserved it, and didn’t hide in bushes like a camping asshole. Now, every match I play will just make me feel dead inside… Like I do in real life. I have to find a way to win, but at the same time let someone else win. What if I reach second place again, and then take suicide? I wouldn’t win, but I knew I could have. No, there has to be another way. That’s when I saw it, there’s a hole in the sky! If I can get up there, I can jump over the storm. Hmm… can’t build a tower. In the Bible, they built one and God invented languages so they couldn’t communicate. What if I build a tower here and the developers remove the chat feature? I’m instead going to have to build… a stairway to heaven. Yeah… that’s… yeah, I knew it. What I meant to say was, a staircase to the celestial sphere. The first try, I felt confident. I landed on a mountain, so I was closer to the sky. Things went great… Then I fell to the ground and died. I didn’t have enough material. Math is not my strongest subject. I need to spend more time gathering wood in a place with a lot of it. This song does not end. There. 40 stairs should be enough to reach space. I’m really making progress! And I forgot about the battle royale part. This game really needs a construction underway sign so people can build in peace. OK… I need to travel far away from the bus to avoid the whole online thing. In this swamp, no one will be able to find me. But flying this far away has given me less time to finish my construction. If I rush… I failed hard. Maybe I can build through the stor… Nope, it ripped my staircases to pieces. Not to worry, the water will slow my fall. That’s some hard water! This time I will finally succeed, I mean, look at his hair! And, I almost reached it. But then my character froze to death because it’s cold up there. Now you might say, “Go to the store and buy a jacket!” But they didn’t have one on sale. And even if they did, it wouldn’t have mattered because my character would have died from no oxygen I’m sure I probably could have solved that too but you know what, instead I’m gonna go do the DRUGS. That promising teenager died from an overdose ten minutes later. Hello, I’m Kilian. Yes, this entire thing was an anti-drug PSA. What led Battlemaster2005 down this path? “I feel bad for taking the award away from someone who deserved it.” Exactly! He didn’t try his best, because he considered people online to be human. Having empathy for other players? What a loser! So always try your best in a video game, or you will be sucking dick for heroin.